T-1

This is it.

Tomorrow morning, after what I assume will be a very short nap (I have to be at the hospital by 5:30am, and I honestly don't know how I'm going to sleep with so much stress and anxiety), I will be on my way to the operating room, ready to have my face cut up in multiple places. Just another routine Wednesday right?

For the past year, I've been mentally preparing for this surgery by trying to supress it from my mind completely, or by binge reading every jaw surgery blogs I can find in order to gain the most information possible.

If you're reading this, I'm guessing you're currently in that particular phase. I hope this blog will help you as much as the other ones available out there. It should at least provide you with another point of view and a slightly different experience. I don't know about you, but I do feel better after reading day 0 to 30 from different people who went through the surgery. Because first: they're still alive, so yay? And second: they allow me to prepare for the worst, but also realize it's not always as bad as it seems.

During the last week, I've been gathering all the supplies I think I may need and stock piling everything on my counter. It looks like I'm ready for the apocalypse. I'm just missing the tent at this point. And maybe an axe.

Some of the supplies ready to go; lots more I didn't take pics of.

I've also been busy finishing up some work, warning my clients that I will be off for 3-4 weeks, preparing a cheat sheet for my husband, cleaning the apartment, etc., etc.

Today, we set up the mattress in the living room, ready for my return. I wanted it to be out of the bedroom because my husband has his computer in there and he's got one of those ultra loud keyboard. I'd like to be able to sleep whenever I want, so I figured that was the best idea. Plus, I've discovered that I tend to associate certain places with bad feelings, and I was thinking that if I set the bedroom in the living room, I can have all the bad feelings I want, and once I'm feeling better, getting everything back to normal should give me a good "break" from that moment of my life and allow me to officially return to my normal routine. I don't know if that makes sense to you, but it does to me :P

I'm hoping the Christmas tree will cheer me up.

I know some people like to splurge on food and try to gain some weight before the surgery, but I didn't really do that. I let myself go a tiny bit more, eating my favorite foods (cheesecake, grilled cheese, pizza, etc.), but I didn't specifically try to gain some weight. I might regret it later, but I figured I should try to stay healthy-ish. I almost got a cold a few days ago and I was TERRIFIED that they would reschedule. Thankfully, I burned that sucker off with a neti pot rinse (it literally burned in my sinus for hours after, it was awful... but it worked).

My last meal tonight was also not exactly a high note. I've been busy all day and wasn't in the mood to go out to eat, so we just had Trader Joe's mac & cheese, frozen fish sticks and roasted carrots. I did say "healthy-ish", so don't judge.

Fancy last meal.

Anyways. I think I've rambled on enough.

I'll see you guys on the other side!